New President of LAS
Brenda, as a social and cognitive science major with an emphasis in psychology, knows the inner-workings of human cognition. She was able to convince you that she was the best one for the job, even without the help of Walter Mercado; that is some amazing psychic manipulation, I mean persuasion. As the bestest friend ever of the previous LAS president, she knows some things about how to manage a club and she always has a good reference on how to handle club situations.
Returning Vice President
Jorge loved his post as VP so much that he couldn’t resist the opportunity to run for another year. He campaigned and “speeched” his way once again to office. Now that’s dedication. He stands as the one who was victorious on the ballots; he is once again Vice President, just like Chaney.
New Officer of Administration
Alejandra is very passionate about her literature major. That really has nothing to do with her position, but it’s true. However, she too can produce a large, flaming passion towards administrating, a passion like a large flaming dragon of administration, or like a sun that burns for administration. A passion that will singe all of those that have given up on administration, and they too will rise to admire the administration of clubs. Or maybe she will do a vary good job, but won’t get too obsesive.
New Officer of Finance
As an Economics major, she knows all about money and the club’s best use of it. And, no, I don’t mean on a shopping spree with all of the club’s funds at Merced’s grandiose mall; she knows how to keep track of it so the club’s funds don’t “accidentally” go missing into one of the officer’s personal bank account.
Officer of Advertising
As the club’s officer of advertising, Shanti’s job is none other than to advertise for the club (great, this sentence is super redundant and repetitive (so is this parenthesis)). The suggested methods for distributing information are radio commercials, posters, and fliers. She’ll have to be yelling at people to come at our events and make large posters that will probably end up being blown away by a gust of wind, it can sometimes be a real hassle. If you ever see her slapping a poster on some wall, give her some help with the slapping, the club will appreciate it.
Officer of History
This snap-happy fellow is sure to be a great historian. Not only does he attend most of the LAS meetings and events, but he also excels at the art of taking pictures when people are unaware they are having their picture taken. This great art often leads to candid pictures that show how much fun you are having at the LAS events while a fry is hanging out of your mouth.
In a memorable speech (that most present members have probably already forgotten), the technologist once said, “Don’t vote for me, I have no experience.” Those words were appealing enough to the masses, like 10 students, to get him the job (maybe if he had said something like “vote for me as officer of technology” they would have voted him president of the world?).